Monday, September 20, 2010

The Devil Planted a Whale Fossil Right Under the San Diego Zoo

Right here on our backyard, a construction crew hit something hard in San Diego's sandy soil - and it turned out to be a three million year-old whale skeleton. Or, that is, something planted and made to look three million years old (and cool) by Satan, trying to deceive us/the Lord, testing our faith/the librul media, extending the conspiracy.

Come to think of it, this conspiracy is getting too big to keep track of. So let's step back and come up with a partial list of everyone helping Satan with his fossil-planting activities:

- Doctors and scientists (duh, they're evil)
- The Canadian government (double duh)
- The American government
- Biopharmaceutical companies and other American corporations
- Oil companies that look for oil based on Old-Earth theories of geology and biology
- All public American universities
- All private American universities, including almost all sectarian ones, except for diploma mills like Liberty
- > 50% of the population of at least 27 countries, many of them officially Christian
- The mainstream media (well obviously, after that last link)

And now also:
- The San Diego Zoo
- Construction workers at the San Diego Zoo

On the other side you have Kirk Cameron and Kent Hovind. So I can see why people consider this to be a real controversy.

But a more important question: I'm still confused as to how exactly induction in the conspiracy would work. I'm sure we can get someone in the construction crew to talk. Are there shadowy figures who show up and offer cash money to the construction workers so they keep quiet about the evil scientists who planted it? Maybe it's just deadly mind-control beams? Anyway, if there's money I sure as heck want to know where my check is.

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